Is your child desperate to share everything they notice or discover with you? Do you sometimes wonder whether they might actually wear your name out?
Whether it’s a baby pointing at a bird, a toddler shouting ‘Mummy’, or a preschooler demanding that you come look at what they’ve made… These everyday moments create some of the most important learning opportunities.
Conversations are about much more than words. They are an exchange of information, emotion and social connection. In fact, conversations begin long before children can talk. A baby’s cries, smiles, eye contact, gestures and babble are all ways of communicating with the people around them. As children grow, these early interactions become questions, stories, jokes, explanations and endless cries of ‘watch me!’ Every one of these exchanges helps children learn about themselves, other people and the world around them. They help to build brains, relationships, knowledge and vocabulary, laying the foundations for learning long before a child ever enters a classroom.
Building brains
A child is born already equipped to process language and distinguish between different speech sounds. Hearing words helps to build a rich vocabulary in their brain long before they actually start speaking.
The brain develops rapidly in the first three years and forms neural connections that are used for all sorts of functions. During this critical period a child’s brain is flexible and particularly receptive to language input. It is literally shaped by experiences, reorganising itself as more language is heard, creating and strengthening more neural pathways.
Building relationships
Attachment theory states we are born wired to seek relationships with others. When these relationships and attachments are positive and secure, children feel safe enough to explore the world and interact with others, this paves the way for learning and understanding.
Conversations with very young children help them develop social skills. They learn adults care about them and they are valued and respected. Through meaningful discussion, children learn to identify and articulate feelings, this fosters emotional intelligence and the development of self-awareness. They learn they should take turns to speak and actively listen to what the other person is says. This develops empathy, understanding, and respect for others’ opinions.
Building knowledge
Language is used for communication but is also linked to memory, attention, problem solving and self-regulation. Good language skills support cognitive growth in general and literacy skills in particular. Conversations expose children to ideas about family life, jobs, nature, animals and countless other topics. They help them learn, explore, make sense of the world, encourage questions, fuel curiosity and spark a love of learning. Research suggests educational outcomes are impacted upon significantly by the quantity and quality of adult-child interactions.
Building vocabulary
A typically developing child will at:
one
respond to their own name
two
understand between 200 and 500 words.
three
use up to 300 words.
four
talk in sentences of four to six words
five
have acquired almost all the grammar they will ever need for their first language.
The quality and quantity of children’s vocabulary at age five is a strong predictor of how well they are going to do in the future. Research suggests children with larger vocabularies have better brain connectivity particularly between the areas of the brain which process language. They are likely to do better at school and have better life outcomes. This is why conversations very young children are so important. They are vital for the overall development of language, cognition, social skills, and emotional literacy.
When you talk to your child you show them how to express thoughts, feelings and ideas. They learn new words; grammar and concepts and begin to reason and make connections.
Conversations can be about anything and everything. The important thing is not the topic but the connection. Creating an environment rich in language and interaction can literally help shape a child’s future.
The good news is that supporting language development doesn’t require special equipment, expensive resources or formal lessons.
Five simple ways to build language every day
- Talk about what you’re doing as you cook, shop or travel.
- Follow your child’s interests and talk about what they notice.
- Read together every day, even for a few minutes.
- Give children time to respond rather than rushing to fill silences (at least seven seconds and yes that does seem like an eternity!).
- Ask open questions such as ‘What do you see?’ and ‘What happened next?’
Still have questions?
If you have concerns about your child’s communication, language or understanding, speak to their preschool, health visitor or GP. Early support can make a real difference and it’s always worth having a conversation if something doesn’t feel quite right.
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Play B C offers term-time or 48-week places, combining relationship-led early education with a play-rich, nurturing environment designed around real family life.
About the author
Marsha Dann is the founder of Play B C Preschool, a former primary school teacher with an MA in Education. She has worked with children and families for over 20 years and is passionate about helping children get the best possible start in life.
What to read next…
Find out how you can support your child’s learning through connection. here
